Fatboy Slim and moldy colours

Today: 

• Harvest for the restaurants - Ulla, Brasserie, Empress and Zambris (in order of drop off)
• Treated to iced mochachino and peanut butter cookie with Rob. Chinatown, Victoria.
• Picked up Globe and Mail. The Times Colonist doesn't have real news. It doesn't have articles about the NDP leadership campaign. Instead it notifies you the weight of the biggest sockeye salmon caught on Labour Day weekend. 

This evening:

• Enjoyed corn on the cob with the delivery man and the "boss" (according to her mug)
• Read the Globe and Mail (parts of it)
• Downloaded music -- Fatboy Slim, The Sheepdogs, The Rolling Stones, Ralph Stanley and Jimmy Carter, The Notorious B.I.G and Tupac --- country and rap --- two music genres that I now like
• The big event this evening was revealing the gouda. I walked into the milking room and Susan said "Did you remember the gouda?" Hand over mouth. "No!" "Well, it's ready." Relief. Oh goodness, for a moment I thought I messed up the only hard cheese I have yet attempted. Well I looked at it, and mold every colour of the rainbow had claimed my gouda as it's new home. After washing off all of my gouda's new residents, the cheese was less colourful and more appealing. Then the best part of making cheese: cutting the first slice. Well, I'll let you know, it's official, I made gouda. This was an example of a successful abandoned cheese. Susan and I normally make abandoned cheeses. They're quite resilient. It feels quite splendid actually. I have learned a new skill. Successfully. I can make cheese.

Life on the farm is moving along. I no longer notice the passing of a week. I'm fully flung into the routine of a week. 

• Tuesday - restaurant harvest, Victoria delivery
• Wednesday - morning and evening milking, break in the middle of the day
• Thursday - morning milking, work till four
• Friday - market harvest
• Saturday - market
• Sunday - day off
• Monday - ride my bike to Sooke, drink an Americano while writing a letter at "The Stick", volunteer at Ayre Manor, ride my bike home

This is the flow of life for me at the moment. I feel quite lucky to be able to live such a simple, focused life right now. I think that I'm being enabled to appreciate the smaller things in life. Sitting on the patio watching the evening sky is an activity I commonly partake in. Being still, just sitting and breathing is something I have time to do. I consider myself fortunate. 

I do crave more though. I think this is partially an innate human condition, but also a fault of my own. An inability to be satisfied. I cannot find my satisfaction in community, in farming, in physical activity, in school, or by being an activist, an adventurer, beautiful, unique, or even by having perfect relationships, having success, or by having a significant other. I need to crave one thing and one thing only. Until the search I constantly am finding myself on is a search for the heart of God I'm going to be wandering in the dark. I'll be wandering through potlucks, gardens, concerts, and jogging trails. I don't want to be stumbling through life. I want to be walking with the Lord.

There's a little taste of sincerity. Now if you could only taste my gouda.